Just The Tip Please

I went out with an old friend recently and we started talking about the blog, and began to trade some stories, one of her stories was so funny I just had to write about and share a few of my own run ins when it comes to sanitizing post sex.  Now, I totally get that when you’re in the heat of the moment bodily fluids are flying, sweat is dripping off both of your bodies, and god only knows what is being transmitted from one person to the other.  But most people really aren’t concerned with that, they may worry about it in a week, a month, or maybe if all of a sudden their strangely itchy down there, but for the most part, you’re enjoying the moment and your partner…except in these few instances.

I hooked up with a guy back in college, we had made out a few times but nothing had gone on below the belt.  One night my roommate left the two of us alone so we got done to business.  The deed was done quick, and no sooner could I put my thong back on, but I heard water running…..okay….apparently he needed to shower instantly??  Odd, I thought, guess we won’t be cuddling.  He came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, completely dressed, and acted like he just went to pee..no big deal.

A few years later I met a guy, that had a similar reaction to me post hookup – i’m beginning to think maybe i’m the problem?  This guy and I had been fooling around for a few weeks, but it wasn’t until i was at his house one night, on his air mattress nonetheless, that I noticed his odd ritual after hooking up, I had noticed it before but didn’t seem to care until that night….he’d immediately get up after we were done and Purel himself, I’m not talking one pump we’re done, i’m talking Pureling himself as if he were being baptized…how about you stand there and I’ll just dump the Purel all over your body buddy?  Or better yet, how about we don’t hook up – so I don’t have to feel like I have the plague afterwards.  Odd…

I found my friend’s story refreshing because this time she was the one cleaning herself post hook up.  My friend was hooking up with a guy who she thought may be dirty, but wasn’t sure, she knew he had been with a lot of partners in the past, and he hadn’t had an STD test in years…so she was naturally a bit concerned, but her urge to hook up with this guy was irresistible.  She didn’t sleep with him, but was doing everything else.  When my friend would return home from these late night booty calls she’d immediately go into her bathroom and grab the hydrogen peroxide under her sink…and would proceed to wash her arms, hands, and mouth with it.. “Oh yeah I’d gargle with it, grab a face cloth and clean my crotch, I would be the stuff in bulk at Costco, heck one time I even got into the shower and just poured the stuff over my head.”  Ummm okay, psycho.  JK I love my friend, but really…so how long did this go on for you ask… her answer, “MONTHS!”  It went on for months??  I give my friend props for not excessively cleaning her body with hydrogen peroxide in front of the man, but at the same time, honey just don’t hook up with the guy if you’re that concerned!